Tuesday, November 07, 2006
i dont even know what im blogging for.
accomodation has been changed back to the service apartments.mr lim called me,kinda listed out the pros and cons of both la.in the end,i decided safety over cost.duh.anyway.he told me something about mr tan wanting to cancel this whole expedition.i agree,that this time.the planning was crap.dont know what we were up to also actually.but it's our expe after all,instead of helping us out,why are you like washing ur hands off this whole thing?and mr lim said smth about changing things as and when i like it,the learning process not there.hw do you expect we know this kinda stuff when we're doing it for the first time?its like.the entire expe planning process is so sucky that even the teachers are giving up.i felt like a total failure.i hafta admit.i did screw up here i guess.pushing too hard for the backpackers place.i was thinking too much on the cost side,and probably didnt really consider other factors.but i was considering the fact that many people were having some or much difficulty paying for this trip.and that $500 for a 6day msia trip was very expensive.that aside.the two teachers arent really helping us out here.what i feel is that they're just standing there,giving advice,and using strong words to bruise our morale.perhaps they should consider my/exco feelings when they say things?actually,throughout this whole expe planning process,i havnt heard a single word of encouragement.all were of criticisms/complaints.
The comments made by the teachers yesterday,today,the day before,are all running through my head.it is not a nice or good feeling and i just cant get it out of my head.its like equations all equating to-El's not doing his job right(in a nice language).in a more direct way,-EL's lousy.im sick and tired of all these and ive seriously had enough of their NON-ENCOURAGING remarks.
argh.sorry guys.shouldve did more thinking and not be so "aggressive".but as long as this expedition still goes on,i am still gona try and do my job properly.
theres a meeting tmr on the expe.im so hoping that they dont do anything to dampen our already soaking wet morales.cancelling the expe is totally out of the point.dont THINK about it.
"It's just so numb"
